Ain't acting - Just enjoying d SHOW!!~

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go

I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

Vio + Work = Bitch??

Never explain yourself. Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it. -- Belgicia Howell

I guess I have much more enemy than I ever thought..especially when I have to constantly explain and apologise for things that I've never done, deal with conflict that im not actually aware of and nevertheless involve myself in misunderstanding that leaves me with no room to defence.

As rumours spread - Vivio, u r a bitch!!~

" The flying rumours gather'd as the roll'd, Scarce any tale was sooner heard than told; And all who told it added something new. And all who heard it made enlargements too - Alexander Pope"

Why so serious??

Was just wondering...

Do I actually need a ground for naming people as "bitch", "jerk" or maybe "scum"???

If I happen to personally not favouring someone due to the things he/she did and I tell my friends about it, am I consider as defaming that particular person??

What if I prefer not telling things out verbally but place the incident in writings on my blog to express my thought on that particular person in the mentioned incident??

When I write, I reserved in mentioning that particular person's name but on the other hand stated some details of that person to describe him/her...And..That makes me wonder : Aren't the readers are the one who is actually accusing people since I'm just writing what is in my mind and smart readers can have their judgment after reading, right?? To what extent you believe in what I write, to what extent that you know I'm bullshitting..
Aren't you still not adult enough to judge??

Don't take things that seriously when it comes to blog entries..Its after all a personal and casual writing anyway..If you prefer to be serious, perhaps you should consider searching for journals and articles and place yourself into the whole bundle of them till you choked yourself than to do blog hopping and read what happens in people's life.

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on." --Robert Frost

Karma - What Goes Around Comes Around

How many people actually believed in Karma?? Vivio is a true believer in karma. You get what you give, whether it's bad or good. Illogically, You might think that she just being superstitious; logically, you'll realize that it is in fact only a law of cause and effect. Karma is the effects of all deeds actively created by our past, future, and present experiences. Thus, we are responsible for our own life, including the pain and joy it brings to ourself and others.

Contrary to popular misconception, karma has nothing to do with punishment and reward. It exists as part of our holographic universe's binary or dualistic operating system only to teach us responsibility for our creations and all things we experience are our creations.

I had planted few bad seeds recently, was wondering all these happened because those parties involved owed me in the past life and thus they are returning everything to me now by these incidents OR I had done a new bad cause and hence I'll have to return everything to them in my next life?? I heard a quote of "Born because of the karma of their past mistakes, they make more mistakes, and fall into mistakes", does this means that human'll just over and over again suffered from this visual cycle of cause and effect??

There's never a definite answer for the question. Somehow, we just try every possible way to be good to people around; love and kindness are never wasted, they bless the one who receives them and the giver. While for the bad deeds that I ever planted, I understand that nothing can exist without a cause hence I'll pay for what I do and what I become someday. With blessings to myself that I'll free from all resentful thoughts and kindly forgive me for whatever I've done wrong.

"Karma moves in two directions. If we act virtuously, the seed we plant will result in happiness. If we act non virtuously, suffering results" - Sakyong Mipham

Ex lovers - friends or strangers??

I remembered a friend of mine told me that a couple wouldn't be friends after they broke up, if they happened to be, its either one party has been constantly giving in due to love or both of them had never really love each other. I USED to totally disagree with the above opinion as I was rather fine with my ex-es.

Somehow, my good record was being broken by someone that had seriously pissed me off. The first ever ex of mine that turns out to be a stranger after we broke up. I was thinking that we really can be friends but all these was just an utopia when I realized a series of lies from him and stupid silly Vivio was actually just being taken for granted. This is when an ex lover becomes stranger because you know it well that its over and treating him as your friend'll just hurt you more at the end.

For ex-es who remain as friends, its not that I never really love. I swear to god that at the time Im with them, I vowed to be with them for life. Perhaps I had acted as the party who love and constantly giving in for them, after all, I don't stop loving them, I just simply learn to live without them and hoping that they have a better life ahead even their happiness have no part of me. When storms happened, when they are lost, Im still always and forever there for them. Pathetic Vivio, but who is the one who'll wipe away your tears and be there for you when you are miserable??

Sometimes I do wonder that when they look into my eyes and watch my heart shatter, does it break their heart too?? or crack a little bit?? or nothing?? *sigh*

Done with all these craps. Just hope that life'll be better ahead for Vivio, for people who loves Vivio and nevertheless for the people whom Vivio loves. *muacks*

"If we never felt sorrow, we'd never recognize bliss. At this rate I should be in a full state of bliss for the rest of my days" - Dennis Quaid

Farewell 2008, Welcome 2009

I never really have any new year resolution, plan and worse not even a wish for every year. Somehow I do look back on 31st of Dec to see what I've done for every particular year.

2008 seems to be a year that I progressed a lot, perhaps a year that I had learned too much compared to those previous one. Started to have a new concept on life, relation, marriage, friendship, family and lots more. Vivio had no longer taking life as serious as she used to be, no longer placing herself in a distress condition to please the whole world but not herself and no longer bother about what people had been gossiping about her.

She finally finds it acceptable to have a relation that remains people to be single at the same time, friends who acted as couple at times, marriage that doesnt everlasting anymore and acknowledge the importance of having family members.

Grown up, having a different perspective now somehow makes her more likely to lost herself again and to be exact, she actually did. She just answered a friend of hers that she has no freaking idea at all what she wanted in life. She has been keep telling herself about ignorance but at the end, I just feel like she is running away from everything rather than the literally ignoring. Anyhow, farewell 2008, thanks alot that I've learned and slightly wiser now.

There are times that she just feel like breaking down and cry, just keep crying BUT she knew it so well that tears doesn't help, life wouldn't be better no matter how loud she cried, misery wouldn't disappear, fact remains unchanged.

2009, is just another year, nothing to be really cheer on. She just hopes that this year'll be better. Pray hard to the God not to force her learn so fast by experiencing a series of tragedies again, pray hard that she'll be given a better route to walk in 2009. Welcome 2009!!!~ Better days ahead.

Poetic Justice

Had a killer paper - Public International Law (PIL) 8.30am this morning. It was a killer paper yet lazy Vivio only started to open up the material on PIL around 2am+. This doesn't prove to people how smart she is but in fact merely showing everyone her blind folded bravery. Spending a long night with Martin Dixon doesn't contribute significantly while answering the questions. Perhaps, neither spending a one whole wonderful semester with him does help much in exam. Frankly, I was rather overwhelmed with the bizarre type of questions by our dear PIL lecturer. Feel real great that I did not sacrifice my fun time on it nor wasted much time studying it since no matter how much you've studied, it just doesn't help.

I was playing with PhotoFunia for the entire afternoon. It is a quick and easy way of putting effects on your photo. Here are some of the examples of the picture I had edited. (=

Perhaps you would like to checkout the website and edit some picture on your own. Kindly surf http://www.photofunia.com/ and you'll have a variety choices of photo background.

Chloe and I went for swimming at Danau Golf Club during late evening. It was closed but two of the mischiveous adults here just trespassed the place and jump into the pool without any doubt. It was rather fun to break the laws at times. Soon after we jumped into the pool, a few guys followed us and did the same thing but it is obvious that they did that after rounds of considering and discussion. Both of u swim there for around 30minutes till we were being chased out by some person in charge there. *giggles*

At times, it was really fun to do something like this. However, poor Vivio is suffering from the consequences now. Even though we are free from the charge of trespassing, I somehow suffer from eyes infection due to the dirty pool water. *sobz* My left eye is in red now and sort of swelling up. What a silly girl I am to swim at such dirty pool and stink a little like a drain. huhu.. The poetic justice took place at last.. Never try to break the laws =(

The most decisive actions of our life ... are most often unconsidered actions - Andre Gide (BUT this doesn't apply to my case)

Sick Sick Sick

After having such a great time for the entire week, Vivio finally fall sick. She is having flu, a quite serious one indeed. =( Has been keep sneezing since last night till today. Can even feel the heat on the nostril and the skin there is peeling due to too much of rubbing with tissue paper.

She still have to sit for her Jurispudence paper tommorow at 8.30am, wonder if her condition will be getting worse since she is not taking any medication. She does not want to take any medication because even the medicine does not cause drowsiness, it still makes you feel real exhausting. Another reason being she hates pills!! (Nobody likes it anyway)

Havn't start studying for her Jurisprudence so have to stay awake till she finished that paper. Hope Aristotle, Socrates, Dworkin, Austin, Hart, Kelsen, Fuller, Rawl and Devlin can have a little mercy on her and wouldn't torture her with all those weird and illogical philosophies. After having some dosage of Vitamin C, gotta start working on them now..

There goes the fate of a sick cat..*meow*